After finally getting divorced the end of 2007 to my first husband, Mike R and myself decided to get married in January of 08. I thought it was the right thing to do since he was so wonderful to me and the kids. I never had someone treat me as well as he did and I knew I could always depend on him. Marriage was the logical answer...(or so I thought)
After being married for a couple of months I received a phone call from my Daddy stating that he had some testing done and he was found to have brain cancer. I heard the words but could only hold the phone speechless. I called my brother and it was the hardest phone call I've ever made. I didn't know exactly what all this meant but I only hoped it meant he would get chemo and would be ok. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. He was diagnosed April 6th. I went down to be with him in Tennessee since I was the one that wasn't working and took my oldest with me. After spending even just a couple of weeks there, I could see my Daddy, who was always this strong, "mans man" of a human being becoming weaker and weaker. It got to the point that he couldn't drink liquids and was completely helpless with everyday living arrangements. I came back up to MI for a short while when my brother went down to be with him and after hearing we should be coming back down there, My mom, sister in law, niece, nephew, myself, and my 2 kids took off down there. We got there the morning of June 14th which also happened to be the day before Fathers Day. I whispered in my Daddys ear that we were there and we were ok and it would be ok to go on. I swear to this day he waited until he heard the sound of his grandkids and kids one more time. At 4:45pm that day he was gone to be with the Lord. During this very trying and painful time in my life I had my family there but for some reason didn't feel the need to have my husband with me. I did however feel the need to be in contact with Dan. Although it was strictly basic texting back and forth about how Danny was doing, it made me feel better because at least I still had a "connection" with him. I knew that he was in a very happy relationship and was almost certain that they would end up getting married. I had to accept that fact and although it was so hard, I learned to live with it. I made it through my daddys funeral and somehow made it through the next day which was Fathers Day. My brother barbecued some steaks (my Daddys favorite thing to do) in his honor and we had the hardest Fathers Day ever.All the drama of a family death was done and we were on our way back to MI to try and continue on life.
When we got back Mike R and myself had moved into a house and out of the apartment. Him and I had continued to have a rocky existence. There had been some things that had happened that I had a REALLY hard time accepting and I believe because my heart in all honesty still belonged to Dan, it made what happened with Mike and I even worse. We tried talking and working through everything and I thought for awhile we had. The summer of 08 my cousin and her 3 kids came to stay with us at my house....
